Tea-bagged

Last Wednesday started out as a challenging one. Someone had woken up on the wrong side of his crib, and it wasn't going to be long until he was back there. We went about our usual routine - diaper change, breakfast, morning run. It was hot, and the sunshine wasn't helping him cheer up much. Upon our return home, the denial of M&M's sent him into a tantrum - that tantrum won him an early nap.
Tate laid down for his nap, giving in easier than I expected - and I sat down with a reheated cup of coffee and the paper. The deafening silence was so welcomed...I was having one of those mom days - what I didn't realize is that the morning wasn't even going to hold a candle to what the afternoon had in store.
I was pleased to find that the nap had served it's purpose. Tate awoke with smiles and conversation - he was in a much better mood and I, thankful for this, was ready to take on the afternoon. Lunch was one of his favorites - macaroni and cheese, although I jazzed it up a little with some ham bits and peas in hopes of adding some much needed nutrition. He devoured a healthy portion and then set off to play with toys while I cleaned up lunch. There is a moment that every parent knows...that moment of silence where there is only one of two possibilities - a full diaper or some type of trouble. As I peeked around the corner, I knew, as usual it was the latter of the two that was about to unfold. In Tate's hands I see two of the gallon size Lipton tea bags - the kind you use to brew sun tea. As I stepped toward him, he gave me that mischievous smile and used all his might to rip them apart. After the tea explosion cleared, my horror began. Tate was looking at me, about ready to explode in panic - I wasn't far behind. Where his eyes were supposed to be, I saw nothing but tea grounds - his nostrils had tea lining the outside and I started to fear that he had inhaled it into his lungs. Common knowledge and having a mother as an EMT has taught me a lot over the years. I knew that it was incredibly important to get the tea out of his eyes, more important that it was done without rubbing, in order to protect them from scratches. Instantly Tate reacted the way you would expect him to, he balled his fists, started the tears, and rubbed. I did the best I could to clean them out using a cold wash rag - I was starting to see the whites of his eyes again, but I knew that they would have to be irrigated. We were the only ones home, and my futile attempts at irrigating left me dialing the number to the doctors office. Luckily for us, they had an opening and if we left now - that meant we could get in. I packed Tate up as fast as I possibly could and flew the 22 miles to New England. Tate was doing alright and that made me think that maybe I had gotten most of it out. Oh how wrong I was.
The next hour and a half of my life was the most horrific I have experienced thus far, and I wouldn't doubt that Tate feels the same way. They had to irrigate both eyes, which meant that I basically had to lay on top of him to hold him down as the saline solution poured over every crevice of his face. He, not understanding what was going on, fought every second of it. After two rounds of irrigation, there was still tea in both eyes - and despite finally getting him calmed down, I was informed we had to do it again.  I had held it together until then, until Tate heard the doctor say one more time, and gave me that begging look - the look of helplessness, that I was the only one that could save him. With tears streaming down my face, I apologized and placed him back down on the table. I felt his body go limp. He was so exhausted from the fight, and from basically being water boarded, that he gave in. Tate was still crying, but his body was no longer working against us - and they were able to get the remaining tea out of his eyes.
After all was said and done, he reluctantly took a sucker from the nurse, and huddled into me for protection. I was still his safety, but oh how I felt like I had failed him.
He fell asleep instantaneous to being placed in his car seat. Tate slept peacefully the whole way home, but I couldn't stop the tears. That night, there was no battle over M&M's and I let him have more Scooby Snacks than any toddler should eat in a week - let alone a day. We snuggled with ice cream, and we didn't even attempt the antibiotic eye drops. He is now scared of the bath - the thought of water on his face sends him into sheer panic. But he can see, and the only lasting damage is the fear he carries with him.
I had looked in that cupboard a million times, and had truly believed that every danger to his health was far out of his reach. Let my experience be a lesson, there is a hidden danger in everything. That doesn't mean we have to be helicopter moms, but give those items a second look. Think outside the box, trust me - you won't regret it....

Into the Garden...

Last night, as the sweltering heat started to decline, I wandered out to the garden to explore for ready produce. As I meandered into the middle of the garden, I noticed that my plants were moving. Now, when I say moving - I don't mean from the slight breeze helping to wick away the summer sweat. There were little black bugs everywhere, including my legs. Immediately, in horror, I jumped out from the garden, brushed myself off, and ran into the house to consult the book of knowledge - the internet. What I found, was one absolute possibility - flea beetles. In all my life, I have never heard of such a thing. Yet, here they were, right before my eyes - their army had invaded, and I was feeling defeated. Upon reading a little further, I noticed that this is a common problem in many areas, and that there was a solution to be found.
After searching the bathroom, I found ingredient number one. That trusty bottle of rubbing alcohol that serves many purposes you would never think of. I took that to the kitchen and mixed my solution - 2 parts rubbing alcohol, 5 parts water, and 1 teaspoon of liquid dish soap.
I was quick to notice, upon my return to the battleground, that these little buggers were nesting mostly in my radishes and taking over whatever they could jump to from there. I pulled every last radish plant (something that should have been done awhile ago) and disposed of them far away from the garden. From there, it was time to battle. I used all of my solution on as many plants as I could cover. It seemed to be helping - at least the little buggers weren't jumping to attack me any longer.
This morning, I headed out to see my success. To my surprise, there were still some soldiers, but their numbers had been significantly reduced. I mixed up more solution and sprayed again.  Here's to hoping for their utter defeat by the end of the day!!

Now, my garden is nothing to write home about. It is the first time planting in this location, which means it was recently tilled prior to planting. I didn't do any of the recommended prep, and most of the seeds were shoved in the dirt between rain showers that soaked our area for most of the planting season. Many of the seeds never sprouted - some were replanted again. That brings me to my cucumbers. Apparently they were just late, because after we replanted new seeds, we quickly noticed that both rounds of planting were peeking up through the tough crust. Even after pulling roughly 50 cucumber plants, the remaining ones have taken over. If every yellow flower turns into a cucumber, we could potentially hold the world record for production in one season. Okay, so maybe it isn't that many - but there are a lot of them. I know that the most logical solution is to can, and thankfully we have had someone offer to help us if we decide to go that route. Someday, I hope to be prepared enough to learn how to do it as I truly miss the staple of my youth - homeade pickles and pickled green beans. This is not going to be that year. Don't get me wrong, I truly love garden fresh cucumbers and could probably eat them every day, however the same recipes get old over time. So, I am looking for suggestions - what do you do with your over abundance of cucumbers? Do you have any to die for recipes that I should try??

Ah-Ha

Sometimes you have an ah-ha moment. For me, it often resonates thru my speakers - a song playing on the radio, that is fiercely correlating with my emotions. It seems as if the lyrics reach out to grab me if only to describe how I am feeling when I can't seem to put into words. It is, as if, until that moment I am the only one in the world who is feeling this way, even though reality reminds me that is likely not the case. 
During my initial transition to stay at home mom, I was struggling in several aspects. All of a sudden, I wasn't just a guest at the supper table anymore, it was up to me to fill our day with lessons, love, and laughter. I don't think I was quite prepared for what that meant, and some days I still don't think I know. What I did know, was that nothing in my expensive college education left me feeling prepared for the journey I was embarking on. In the beginning, there were some very difficult days for me, as a mom. There were times I shed tears, times I locked myself in the bathroom, and times where I grew extremely frustrated (now who sounds like the toddler?). I remember one particularly challenging day, nothing I did made him happy. In fact, it seemed as if my interaction - of any kind - only made things worse. As my frustration grew, I started to believe that I was a horrible parent and became worried that every day was going to be like this. 
When he laid down for a nap, after I recollected myself, I thought I would take a few moments to catch up with the world. I started perusing Facebook, in search of anything that would make me feel better - Then, there it was...someone had shared this miraculous blog post about being the parent of a small child(ren) and I cried as I read it, because it was as if this Steven Wiens guy could read my mind.
This time it wasn't a song blaring over my speakers. Instead, it came from a man whom apparently had once been in my shoes...a man who was brave enough to put these feelings into words for the world to see, and then share them so poor lost souls like me could read them. This one article changed my entire perspective.  It made me realize that these moments aren't about perfect, or right, or wrong, they are about doing the best you can with it. There are going to be hard days, and times when I make mistakes - because I am human. In no way does that make me a failure as a parent.  
So, if you have or have ever had a small child, I encourage you to read these words, if you haven't already. Maybe it won't have the same profound effect as it did for me, but there is wisdom there that every parent deserves to hear.

To The Parents of Small Children: Let me be the One Who Says it Outloud 

Tate

I quietly sit beside you, watching as you play
thinking about all the things I should be doing today.
You look up and smile, and unknowingly melt my heart,
and there is nothing in this moment so important I must start.

I help you build a castle, and you giggle as you undo my work
each carefully placed block unravels, your joy makes me smirk.
As the pile grows larger, your frustration starts the same
caught up in your laughter I missed that we changed the game.

Next we are on to counting, as you search for something to read
One Foot, Two Foot and pages flipped with speed.
You find the page your looking for and get that childish grin,
A billion children, chase and tickle then begin the book again.

You start to rub your eyes, growing is a hard chore
Baby Elmo and your blanket, with the light on you quietly snore.
As I switch the light off, I can't help but watch you sleep
I pray that God watches over you, and some innocence you'll keep.

These moments pass so quickly, in a blink they pass us by
you won't be small forever, and the time will surely fly.
So for today you're my priority, and for tomorrow too,
and as you grow please don't forget, how much your mom loves you.