For the past week we have had a houseguest. A furry, loving, energetic pit terrior mix named Bones. It is safe to say it has been a mixed bag of emotions for this girl. Overall, one thing rings true from this experience - I am still not over the loss of my dog Jake, and simply trying to replace him isn't going to work. So, to say the very least, it has been rather eye opening to the fact that I am not ready to welcome another furry family member.
There are so many things that I miss about that dog. For example, the way Jake quietly towered at my side looking for affection, his excitement about playing fetch in the back yard, and his enthusiasm for cupcakes. I miss him trying to kick Luke out of bed so he could snuggle up next to me, his quiet disdain for the neighbor dog who was constantly trying to hump his leg, and the disheveled couch I came home to everyday from him lounging away the afternoon. I even miss the occasional annoying behaviors he had - like leaving him alone to long would assure he'd help himself to anything in the garbage because we were obviously never returning to feed him, his tendency for bladder infections which led to him having an occasional accident, and the fact that he was 110 lbs and believed he was a lap dog.
There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think of him. People say that eventually there will be. It is amazing how much we grow to love our animals....
So tonight, Bones is heading back to the shelter, for more reasons than I am going to take the time to write about here. He is a good dog, with the potential to be an amazing dog - he just isn't my dog. I wanted to give him a home, even if only temporarily, partially in honor of Jake. It breaks my heart to have to send him back to the shelter, but it is also breaking my heart keeping him here. Sometimes, even the best of intentions come with bad timing.....here is to hoping that maybe someday things will be different.
If you are looking for a dog, please give Bones a look. He deserves a good family that can love him back!
Bones' information:)
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Thursday, January 17, 2013
Up in Smoke
Hello. My name is Kristin. I am a mom, a wife, a warm weather enthusiast, and a lover of Christmas lights. I drink too much diet Mountain Dew, consider chasing after my 1 year old exercise, and never get enough sleep. I like a bottle of wine now and then, love the company of great friends, and I am a smoker. I try to help people make choices everyday to make their lives better. I am trying to make more of those choices myself. This is the year, the year that I will do better at taking care of myself, drink more water, exercise, and.....drum roll please....quit smoking. There, I said it. I am hoping that makes it more real - that I am now accountable to all of you, you who actually take time to read the words I put on this page. (Thank you for that by the way:)
So now.....to share the cold hard truth. My quit date was going to be set by when I ran out of cigarettes. I didn't want it to be a new years resolution, because I can't remember one that I have ever successfully kept. Not only that, but I have others on my resolution agenda...for example, butting into the lives of those that I miss. However, as noble as the effort is, I must admit I make resolutions half accepting I have already failed (except for this year of course). How positive of me, I know. So for that, and many other reasons, I had no intention of quitting on 1/1/13. If only life actually cared about my plans right?
As life plays out, I smoked my last cigarette on New Years Eve, after enjoying one too many cocktails with my husband. Inevitably that means that my quit date becomes 1/1/13. Day one was super easy. There is truly no better way for me to avoid smoking than to be slightly (that may be an downplay of how I felt that day) hung over, and have smoked to much the night before. Day 2, didn't really phase me either. Yes, it was difficult to be at work and not follow my normal routine - but it was doable. I expected to wake up on day 3 thinking I would die, and that never came. Fast forward to day 4 - on my way home for lunch I was searching for something in the console of my Tahoe....and because life can be cruel, I happen to locate the 6 packs of cigarettes that had been hiding from me on New Years. That was tough. Who would ever know if I had just one? If no one sees you have the cigarette did you actually smoke? But I knew I would be so disappointed in myself and I managed to make it thru day 4. All 6 packs taunting me at every corner.
Day 5, almost day 6, I caved. My already waining discipline was completely dissolved by Bud Light. Not the first time I have made choices that left me disappointed after a few of those. But, it is what it is. I had 3 cigarettes, and they were horrible. But, it felt right - especially with the Bud Light.
I consider it a small victory. I made it 8 days with 3 cigarettes (yes I said 8, I didn't have any for the 3 days after my relapse) before I fired up the chimney again. However, I hear that relapse is a part of recovery.....so, maybe I am on my way to being smoke free sooner than I think.
I plan to try again. On my terms, when I am ready, but sooner rather than later. Like I said - this is the year. Whether I like it or not, I love my son - and I want to do it for us.
So now you know. I am a smoker. For the most part, I like being a smoker. And I am going to try to give that up. So until that happens, please forgive me if I seem a little outta sorts. I am simply trying to remove my addict status, and for those of you who have been there, you know there is nothing simple about that.
So now.....to share the cold hard truth. My quit date was going to be set by when I ran out of cigarettes. I didn't want it to be a new years resolution, because I can't remember one that I have ever successfully kept. Not only that, but I have others on my resolution agenda...for example, butting into the lives of those that I miss. However, as noble as the effort is, I must admit I make resolutions half accepting I have already failed (except for this year of course). How positive of me, I know. So for that, and many other reasons, I had no intention of quitting on 1/1/13. If only life actually cared about my plans right?
As life plays out, I smoked my last cigarette on New Years Eve, after enjoying one too many cocktails with my husband. Inevitably that means that my quit date becomes 1/1/13. Day one was super easy. There is truly no better way for me to avoid smoking than to be slightly (that may be an downplay of how I felt that day) hung over, and have smoked to much the night before. Day 2, didn't really phase me either. Yes, it was difficult to be at work and not follow my normal routine - but it was doable. I expected to wake up on day 3 thinking I would die, and that never came. Fast forward to day 4 - on my way home for lunch I was searching for something in the console of my Tahoe....and because life can be cruel, I happen to locate the 6 packs of cigarettes that had been hiding from me on New Years. That was tough. Who would ever know if I had just one? If no one sees you have the cigarette did you actually smoke? But I knew I would be so disappointed in myself and I managed to make it thru day 4. All 6 packs taunting me at every corner.
Day 5, almost day 6, I caved. My already waining discipline was completely dissolved by Bud Light. Not the first time I have made choices that left me disappointed after a few of those. But, it is what it is. I had 3 cigarettes, and they were horrible. But, it felt right - especially with the Bud Light.
I consider it a small victory. I made it 8 days with 3 cigarettes (yes I said 8, I didn't have any for the 3 days after my relapse) before I fired up the chimney again. However, I hear that relapse is a part of recovery.....so, maybe I am on my way to being smoke free sooner than I think.
I plan to try again. On my terms, when I am ready, but sooner rather than later. Like I said - this is the year. Whether I like it or not, I love my son - and I want to do it for us.
So now you know. I am a smoker. For the most part, I like being a smoker. And I am going to try to give that up. So until that happens, please forgive me if I seem a little outta sorts. I am simply trying to remove my addict status, and for those of you who have been there, you know there is nothing simple about that.
Wednesday, January 9, 2013
The Name Game
Exhaustion is setting in. My eyes are refusing to focus and my fingers are fudging letters, but here I sit - thinking it might be proper to give you a brief introduction to our family....how rude of me not to do that initially. And yes, considering it is only 8:30 at night, I absolutely refuse to admit that if I were to just lay my head down on my pillow it would only take a short moment to hit dream street.
I go by Ma ma ma ma ma ma ma in this house, but most people refer to me as Kristin. My daily gig involves helping people who are not currently able to help themselves, for many different reasons. It is challenging, heartbreaking, rewarding, endearing, and all the things in between. Most days, I wouldn't change what I do for the world, which makes me one of the lucky ones.
Just shy of five years ago I agreed to a first date with a hot band guy, who is now my husband. Most know him as Luke, but in this house, he too goes by Ma ma ma ma ma ma ma. We are hoping that will change soon. With the birth of our son, Luke decided to take a break from band life and now has the unfortunate blessing of working outside in the miserable winter elements, but he has the brightest spirit and finds the positive in almost everything. More often than not, he is my sanity. However, somedays - he is also the reason for my insanity, but hey, that's marriage....right?? All things considered, I am a very lucky woman - and I know it!
Our union brought about the busy little man named Tate that you met in my last post. He is the only one that get's called by his given name in this house - but refuses to respond to it. Puff, Tator Tot, Peanut, and No-No don't get much of a response either. He runs the show around here and no matter what we do to try to regain control, reasoning with a 1 year old hasn't been very successful.....
Hello from our family to yours.
I go by Ma ma ma ma ma ma ma in this house, but most people refer to me as Kristin. My daily gig involves helping people who are not currently able to help themselves, for many different reasons. It is challenging, heartbreaking, rewarding, endearing, and all the things in between. Most days, I wouldn't change what I do for the world, which makes me one of the lucky ones.
Just shy of five years ago I agreed to a first date with a hot band guy, who is now my husband. Most know him as Luke, but in this house, he too goes by Ma ma ma ma ma ma ma. We are hoping that will change soon. With the birth of our son, Luke decided to take a break from band life and now has the unfortunate blessing of working outside in the miserable winter elements, but he has the brightest spirit and finds the positive in almost everything. More often than not, he is my sanity. However, somedays - he is also the reason for my insanity, but hey, that's marriage....right?? All things considered, I am a very lucky woman - and I know it!
Our union brought about the busy little man named Tate that you met in my last post. He is the only one that get's called by his given name in this house - but refuses to respond to it. Puff, Tator Tot, Peanut, and No-No don't get much of a response either. He runs the show around here and no matter what we do to try to regain control, reasoning with a 1 year old hasn't been very successful.....
Hello from our family to yours.
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
Parental Guidance
Those of you who know me, know that currently my life revolves around the busiest one year old you will ever meet. He is always in motion, only holding still when it is time to sleep. Long gone are the days of carefree cuddles and naps in the chair together, hello to the days of defining boundaries and helping him navigate the rights and wrongs of the world around us. It is extremely exciting, and completely terrifying at the same time - those of you who have ever had a one year old understand. To the rest of you, well.....I hope you have the opportunity to understand someday.
However, I wouldn't have it any other way. His curiosity and energy are exhausting, but so endearing. I will never understand the wonder that exists in items such as the flipping motion of dad's cell phone, the buttons on the television remote, or the shape of the digital thermometer - not to mention the process of opening and closing doors, swishing the water in the toilet, or pulling the cat's tail. Although I may never understand it, I can appreciate it. The simple magic that exists in the mind of a toddler is amazing, and is a good reminder to myself - not just as a parent, but as a person - that there is magic in places, that as adults, we forget to look. No - I may not find it in the toilet bowl (I sure hope) or in my cupboards, but it does exist and remembering that is half the battle!
So, to any parents who find my blog, and actually take a moment to read it - I would love to hear about some of the things you have experienced/learned while sharing your home with a toddler. The challenges, the triumphs, the feel-good moments.....words of encouragement, words of warning...whatever you feel like sharing.
However, I wouldn't have it any other way. His curiosity and energy are exhausting, but so endearing. I will never understand the wonder that exists in items such as the flipping motion of dad's cell phone, the buttons on the television remote, or the shape of the digital thermometer - not to mention the process of opening and closing doors, swishing the water in the toilet, or pulling the cat's tail. Although I may never understand it, I can appreciate it. The simple magic that exists in the mind of a toddler is amazing, and is a good reminder to myself - not just as a parent, but as a person - that there is magic in places, that as adults, we forget to look. No - I may not find it in the toilet bowl (I sure hope) or in my cupboards, but it does exist and remembering that is half the battle!
So, to any parents who find my blog, and actually take a moment to read it - I would love to hear about some of the things you have experienced/learned while sharing your home with a toddler. The challenges, the triumphs, the feel-good moments.....words of encouragement, words of warning...whatever you feel like sharing.
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